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Feeling or knowing that your girlfriend no longer loves yous can be a heartbreaking and frustrating experience. Fortunately, while you tin't actually control or alter how your girlfriend feels about y'all, there are things y'all tin do to assist save the relationship. Communicate honestly with your girlfriend about where you stand and what you tin both exercise to improve things. Try to rekindle your erstwhile feelings for each other with pity, intimacy, and romantic gestures. If you don't feel like you lot can better the state of affairs on your own, wait into couples counseling or individual therapy.

  1. ane

    Communicate with your girlfriend about what went wrong. If you want to repair your relationship with your girlfriend, you lot will need to observe out why she feels the manner she does. Ask her if she tin can sit down with you and have a heart-to-heart conversation almost how she is feeling and what y'all can both do to brand it better.

    • If you and your girlfriend take been fighting, await until you've both calmed downwards before having a discussion. Trying to talk while both of y'all are upset may lead to more than fighting and resentment.[1]
    • You might start by telling her how y'all experience, and then inviting her to give you her perspective. Apply "I" linguistic communication to express your feelings. For case, "I experience unloved lately, and I'1000 agape nosotros might exist drifting apart. How are you feeling most things betwixt us?"
    • Do your best to stay at-home and civil, and heed actively to what she has to say.

  2. 2

    Avert blaming your girlfriend for issues in the relationship. When things are going wrong, it'due south easy to start pointing fingers. Instead of blaming her for whatever issues between you lot, mind to what she has to say with an open up heed. Once you allow her take her say, you may realize that you lot've been misinterpreting her words and deportment.[ii]

    • Even if your girlfriend is at least partly responsible for things going sour between you lot, blaming her will only put her on the defensive and create a deeper wedge between you.
    • Putting all the blame on her as well takes abroad your own bureau in the relationship and makes information technology harder for you to focus on making things better.[3]

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  3. 3

    Take responsibility and apologize for your own mistakes. Calmly acknowledge your mistakes to your girlfriend and apologize without making excuses or trying to justify yourself. Call up that taking responsibility doesn't mean blaming yourself for everything that goes incorrect. It but means reflecting on your own actions and recognizing that you there are things you may have done that contributed to the rift betwixt the 2 of y'all.[4]

    • For case, you might say, "Y'all're right, I haven't been equally circumspect to you lately every bit I should have been. I permit myself go too defenseless upwardly in my own projects and didn't actually think about your needs. I'yard sorry, and I'll brand an endeavor to practise better from at present on."
    • Avert apologizing in a way that puts the blame on your girlfriend or excuses your deportment. For example, don't say something similar, "I'm lamentable, but y'all shouldn't have frustrated me similar that."

  4. 4

    Validate her feelings . Listening to what your girlfriend has to say well-nigh what she's feeling may be hard, but it's really a skillful thing if she's willing to open up to you. Permit her know that you recognize what she's feeling and respect her correct to feel that way. That will become a long style toward showing her that you really care about her and the relationship.

    • Endeavour showing that yous sympathize what she feels by "reflecting" her feelings dorsum in your ain words.
    • For example, if she complains that you lot spend too much time watching Boob tube instead of having quality time with her, say something similar, "It sounds like you feel lone and frustrated when I watch TV in the evenings instead of sitting down to chat with you lot over dinner."[5]

  5. 5

    Work together to come up with solutions. Once y'all've pinpointed the main problems that are driving a wedge between you and your girlfriend, inquire her if she'd be willing to sit down with y'all and talk about what you tin can both practice to make things improve. Yous can offering your own ideas, simply be certain to ask for her input and mind carefully to what she has to say.

    • For case, if she's frustrated considering she feels similar she's doing too much work in the relationship, talk about ways to separate your responsibilities more evenly. Yous could offer to have turns cooking or washing the dishes, for instance.

  6. vi

    Make a delivery to change and stay consistent. Acknowledging the areas where you need to improve and promising to work on them will not exist enough. Yous need to prove your girlfriend through your deportment that you are truly ready to brand a change. Brand specific promises and follow through on them.

    • For example, mayhap your girlfriend has trouble trusting you considering y'all've been unreliable in the past. Make a point of establishing consistent behavior patterns going frontward—e.g., if yous say you are going to be home at a sure time, make sure y'all are in that location!
    • If y'all practice slip up, ain upward to it and repent immediately.

  7. 7

    Respect her need for space. If things are really bad between y'all and your girlfriend, she may not even exist willing to have a discussion correct now. If she doesn't want to talk, don't try to force it—she volition but end up feeling smothered and resentful. Instead, attain out and permit her know you are willing to talk whenever she's fix, then back off and leave her alone.[vi]

    • Y'all might say something like, "I understand that you don't feel like talking nearly things right at present. I just wanted to let yous know that I love you and actually want us to brand this work if we tin can. I'll exist here if y'all want to talk."

  8. 8

    Take that you may not be able to save the relationship. Retrieve that you can't really control what your girlfriend does or how she feels well-nigh you. All yous can practise is permit her know how you feel and do your best to show her that you lot're willing to work on making things amend.[7]

    • If your girlfriend does break up with you, respect her decision. Lashing out at her or pursuing her when she's asked yous to leave her alone will not make her more inclined to give things another chance.

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  1. 1

    Ask your girlfriend how you can help her feel loved. If your girlfriend is cooling off on yous, it may be because she's feeling unloved herself. Communicate with her openly and inquire her what y'all can practise to show affection in a way that she volition appreciate.[8]

    • Every woman is an individual, so don't assume you lot know what your girlfriend wants or needs. She might want more than concrete affection, or she may wish yous'd spend more fourth dimension discussing her favorite books with her. You won't know until you ask!

  2. 2

    Offer her sincere compliments every twenty-four hours. Everyone wants to experience appreciated, loved, and desired in a human relationship. Ane fashion to rekindle your girlfriend's interest in your human relationship is to remind her of all the things you honey about her.[9]

    • Make sure not to just focus on superficial things, like her appearance. Your girlfriend probably appreciates hearing that you think she's beautiful, simply recall to annotate on who she is as a person, as well.
    • You could compliment her on things like her personality, her accomplishments, or even memories of your time together and what they mean to yous.

  3. three

    Make romantic gestures (and not but on Valentine's Day). Think about the kinds of things you and your girlfriend did together in the early on days of your relationship, when things were exciting and fresh. Doing these things again can help bring back sometime feelings and show that yous are still interested in making the relationship fun and joyful.[ten]

    • For example, you might try surprising your girlfriend with a gift or taking her back to the same place where you had your first appointment.
    • More than practical gestures tin be romantic, too—for case, you could surprise her by cooking her favorite dinner or offering to give her a massage afterward a long day at work.

  4. 4

    Be intimate without expecting sex . If you desire sex all the time, your girlfriend might starting time feeling like intimacy is a chore. Requite her some space, just don't agree back from offering other gestures of affection, similar hugging, cuddling, kissing, or holding easily. You may notice that she becomes more interested in sexual activity once you lot cease trying to initiate information technology equally often.[xi]

    • Yous may also find information technology helpful to have an open and honest talk with your girlfriend virtually what both of you expect from your sexual activity life. Finding out what she likes and doesn't like tin can improve your intimate moments and help you connect on a deeper level.

  5. five

    Show a 18-carat interest in things she cares about. Take fourth dimension to actually get to know your girlfriend and go familiar with her values and interests. She'll feel a stronger and deeper connexion with you if you're able to testify that you are interested in who she is every bit a person.

    • For example, you might ask your girlfriend questions most the things she'south interested in. Watch movies or read books with her so that yous tin can discuss them together.
    • If she has any favorite hobbies, consider trying them out together.
    • Even if you don't find all of her interests that exciting, you tin evidence her that y'all value her past making time to listen when she wants to talk about the things she loves.

  6. 6

    Let yourself to be vulnerable with her. Open up to your girlfriend well-nigh your thoughts and feelings. If you lot're not used to being vulnerable, this can feel scary or uncomfortable at first. All the same, doing and then volition help create a more meaningful connexion between the 2 of you and will show your girlfriend that you trust her and experience at ease with her.[12]

    • Being open and vulnerable tin can also help you become your needs met, because your girlfriend will have an easier fourth dimension understanding and empathizing with you.

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  1. i

    Ask your girlfriend to nourish couples counseling with you. If your human relationship is really strained or stagnant and you aren't making much headway on your own, talk to your girlfriend nearly counseling. An experienced counselor can help y'all brand sense of what'due south going wrong in your human relationship and work with both of you to develop strategies for improving things.

    • Going to couples counseling is also a good style to testify your girlfriend that yous are serious almost making the relationship work.
    • Do an online search or ask your doctor to recommend practiced couples counselors in your area.
    • If physical intimacy is a big problem in your relationship, you might benefit from seeing a sex therapist.

  2. 2

    Go to counseling on your ain if she won't become with yous. If your girlfriend is unwilling to go to counseling with you lot, don't try to force the issue. Yous may all the same find that you tin can benefit from seeing a therapist on your ain, however. They can give you communication on how to arroyo your relationship in a healthier mode or—if necessary—to motion on.

    • Look for a therapist who has experience helping people with human relationship issues. You might see a clinical psychologist, a marriage and family therapist, or a licensed clinical social worker.

  3. 3

    Look into relationship support groups in your expanse. Support groups can be groovy tools for helping you work through your relationship challenges. Ask your physician or therapist to recommend a back up group for relationship issues in your area, or do an online search for couples support groups near you lot.

    • Support groups tin can be led by professional counselors or completely peer-based.
    • Being with other couples facing similar challenges can help you lot gain insight into your own situation. A grouping tin also be a safe and supportive infinite for you and your girlfriend to work through your issues together.

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  • Question

    Can a daughter fall dorsum in beloved with you while you lot're dating?

    Joshua Pompey

    Joshua Pompey is a Relationship Expert with over 10 years of helping people navigate the online dating world. Joshua has run his ain relationship consulting business since 2009 at a success charge per unit of over 99%. His piece of work has been featured in CNBC, Expert Morning America, Wired, and Refinery29 and he has been referred to equally the best online dater in the world.

    Joshua Pompey

    Relationship Good

    Good Answer

    Support wikiHow by unlocking this practiced answer.

    Admittedly. However, if you lot're in a human relationship and their feelings are fluctuating dramatically from day to solar day, it's really non a proficient sign. You may feel similar a 10 one solar day, and a ix the next day, but it should exist moderately consistent.

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  • If you call back your girlfriend is abusive or that your relationship has become toxic, it'south important to leave the human relationship for your own wellness and safety. Don't try to stay with anyone who regularly manipulates yous, insults or belittles you, attempts to command y'all, threatens you lot, violates your boundaries, or physically hurts you.

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